i already forgotaboutit

Since I’m still in love with johnny depp, i’ve been watching all sorts of his movies — including “Donnie Brasco.”

and as a result of watching that movie this weekend, and then watching the commentary (so I could stare at Mr. Depp for another 127 minutes) i’ve decided to bring back the phrase forgetaboutit.

for those who don’t remember the famous scene (most likely because you saw the movie back when it came out in 1997 like a normal person) here it is (courtesy of whysanity.net) editor’s note: it may not be safe for children younger than 13:

FBI Technician (Tim Blake Nelson): What’s “forget about it?”
Donnie Brasco:“Forget about it” is like if you agree with someone, you know, like “Raquel Welsh is one great piece of ass forget about it.” But then, if you disagree, like “A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it!” you know? But then, it’s also like if something’s the greatest thing in the world, like Mingrio’s Peppers, “forget about it.” But it’s also like saying “Go to hell!” too. Like, you know, like “Hey Paulie, you got a one inch pecker?” and Paulie says “Forget about it!” and then, sometimes it just means forget about it.  

See how USEFUL it is? i mean, it think it’s at least almost as verstile as the word f*ck, but it’s WAY less taboo.

 

Here are some examples I’ve already thought of:

 

my editor: thanks for doing that amazing story.

me: forgetaboutit

 

or

 

me: johnny depp? forgetaboutit

 

or

 

councilor: i’ll give you the story off the record

me: forgetaboutit.

 

I’m pretty certain I’ll be able to work the phrase into conversations on an almost daily basis.

 

AND, so that I can work it into txt messages, im thinking of typing it as 4getabotit on my mobile device. you know, so that it’s not like WAY shorter, but it’s shorter enough to look cool on a cell phone.

 

what’s that? you want to send me a thank-you note for bringing back the phrase? forgetaboutit. 

a heavily weighted topic

i was talking to my 72-year-old great-uncle today about how i read this book and have since become vegan.

him: what’s veegaaon?

me: Basically i don’t eat meat. or eggs. or butter. or chesse. or anything from an animal. in other words, everything i eat comes from a plant

him: that sounds hard

me: well not really. also, I’ve actually been a vegetarian for about six years, so i had already given up meat.

him: if that’s true, how come you have so much weight on you?

me: (crying on the inside). well, umm, I guess im trying to lose it.

I supposse when I’m 72 i won’t care about tact any more either.

UPDATE: just so you know, I have lost about 12 pounds since becoming vegan. if you were wondering.

those with doctorates are fine, it’s doctors i hate

well the book i read about bein’ vegan SAID my stomach would hurt for like a month after i gave up everything-animal — i assumed it was related to some sort of cheese withdrawal — but it’s been like 2.5 months now, and my stomach still freaking hurts.

oh, and i’m STILL dizzy.

Now, a NORMAL person probably would go see a doctor if they were having stomach problems and getting dizzy.

but im a STUPID person, who likes to rationalize things away under the assumption that my health problems will fix themselves. (i do this with cars too). so in that spirit, here is a list of ten reasons why I really, really, really, don’t want to go see a doctor:

1. i freaking hate finding a doctor covered by my insurance.

2. oh ya, and actually, i just hate insurance companies. they’re so manipulative. they say things like ‘oh, you just have to pay $10 and we’ll cover the rest,’ but what they mean is ‘oh, we said TEN dollars? well, we’ll just bill you the other $3,500 for that test we don’t cover. no big deal right?’

3. i hate when doctors are judgemental. and this really makes me mad, because my junior high health teacher told me this wouldn’t be a problem. so not only do i feel judged, i feel lied to.

4. im worried the doctor will tell me i need to lose weight.

5. and then i will tell the doctor that i’m LOSING weight because im vegan.

6. and then the doctor will tell me that being a vegan is SUPER unhealthy. so I’ll feel guilty about my weight AND my diet. and I’ll go home and cry.

i don’t need real friends — i have grey’s anatomy

well, i was trying to be all cool and show my solidarity with the writers of hollywood by saying things like ‘dude, since the writers striked and the networks are tying to randomly bring back shows in the spring, im SO not going to watch them so i can show how important writers are’

and i was doing well.

i didn’t watch desperate housewives.

i didn’t watch boston legal.

i didn’t even watch american idol — because it sucks this year. to show that reality tv writers should be unionized.

but then.

ohhh snap. grey’s anatomy came back tonight.

i love that show. seriously.

i planned my whole stupid day around it. and i got home and made a vegan-organic-frozen dinner, and sat down on my couch and fell right back in love with patrick dempsey.

and im not even embarrased about. i don’t care that my favorite TV blogger doesn’t even acknowledge the show’s existence, because i know it’s out there and i L.O.V.E love it! 

i love the characters. and the writing. and the stories. and the one-liners. ( ”We’re adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?” ~ Meredith) and the way it all gets tied up with a writing bow at the end.

i just do.

and i really do hope they write enough new shows to fill every 8 p.m. to 9:05 p.m of every single Thursday this summer. 

my cue to read ‘the elements of style’

so tonight i was talking to this guy i recently met about my blog.

and he was all “‘ya, i was thinking about starting a blog, but i’m not that good at spelling or grammar.’”

and then i was all, “‘umm, have you read my blog? it’s not about that kind of stuff. it’s about writing without editors.’”

and he was all “‘ya, seeing your blog made me think, ‘if she can do it, i can do it.’”

wait. huh?

what’s that supposed to mean?

i should probably start using capital letters.

p.s. click here if you don’t understand my oh-so-clever title.

now back to your regularlly scheduled programming

ok, ok, so maybe this has kind of become vegan-Johnny-Depp blog.

maybe.

but i don’t really care.

because its my blog.

(yes, that IS me sticking my tongue out at you).

i do, however, want to let you guys know that since mr. depp has left my couch oshkosh, i plan to write about other stuff now.

like the weather.

and stuff.

should be fun times.

and don’t worry, i’ll still write my fair share about bein’ vegan and mr. depp.

and that’s how i bought six johnny depp movies.

so the love of my life has left oshkosh.

that’s right. Johnny Depp (aka, the future Mr. Crystal Lindell) officially left the Sawdust City Friday.

and i got to wait for him to get on his super cool private jet at Basler Airport so i could tell my paper EXACTLY when he left town and we could write it in an article.

and he totally waved at the 14 stalkers gawkers who were there waiting to say good bye

and then it was like 10:30 p.m. and by that time and i NEEDED a depp fix, so i went to the 24-hour wal-mart and bought pirates of the caribbean 3.

and fyi, that movie is NOT worth $19.99.

and then the next day i went to the local movie store downtown and was SO impressed that they were smart enough to have a whole Johnny Depp display that i bought Finding Neverland, Ed Wood and Blow.

and then on Sunday I went to best buy and bought Chocolat and Donnie Brasco.

anyone want to watch a movie?